Little Boy Blue, Tiny Terrestrial (1991)

1991 - Little Boy Blue, Tiny Terrestrial (Cypress Film International Inc)

[Release date 25th January 1991; released on Viva Video in the US as “Tiny Terrestrial: The Filipino ET”]

Director Eddie Reyes Story/Screenplay Joey de Leon, Tony Y. Reyes President/Executive Producer Ding L. Nacpil Cinematography Oscar Querijero Music Mon del Rosario Editor Rene Tala Sound Supervision Albert Rima Sound Effects Ramon Reyes Assistant Director Gerry Reyes Production Manager Renato S. Nacpil Dubbing Directors Vangie Labalan, Evelyn Loreto, Baby Bracamonte, Carmen Serafin Gaffer Rey Trinidad Stills Larry Olleta Legman John “Valoney” Mascarina Makeup Artist Naty Valdez Propsman Mariano Torrente Setman Raymundo Torrente Effectsman Freddie Fajardo Video Cameraman Bayani Francisco Script Writer Tony Pascua Layout Artist Nonong de Andres T.T. Creation Artist Arthur Nicdao

BUKANG LIWAYWAY UNIT 1 Priscila M. Talavera Assistant Cameraman Antonio Trinidad Soundman Rolly Donozo Electrician Arnel Donozo Generatorman Eddie Ilocso Boom Man Romy Bello Crew DJ Manalaysay, Bernan Mendiola, Danny Tendilla, Criseldo Ilocso Unit Driver Boots de la Cruz Space Capsule Creation Kenkoy Torrente Space Capsule Caretakers Danny Torrente, Leonilo Villamayor Wardrobe Caretaker Adel S. Nacpil Caretaker Agrifina de Jesus, Alice de Jesus, Nene Blantucas Utility Men Arnel Nacpil, Jun Gatpayat, Alex Ordonez, Ricky Ordonez Service Drivers Ruben de Jesus, Eddie Razote, Bondat Esguerra

Cast Atong Redillas (Ato), Jay-Are Reyes (Empoy), Jen-Jen Otico (Neneng), Luz Fernandez (Lola Panchang), Lou Veloso (Professor Galileo), Cutie del Mar (Professor Delgado), Joaquin Fajardo (Crocodile Danding), Boy Matias (Little Boy Blue), Nonong de Andres (Nonong), Rene Tupaz (Rene), Jun de Guia (Goon 1), Nemie Gutierez (Goon 2), Botchok Agustin (Goon 3), Danny Labra (Bogart), Torling (Torling), Joey Galvez (Professor Zarate), Mildred Reyes (Mildred), Arlene Raymundo (Miss Raymundo), Esmerelda Testo (Miss Testa), Gin-Gin (Mahal), Tony Pascua (Mang Tonyo), Mayor Conrad Lamano (Teacher), Arnold Sayson (Attendant 1), Ronald Sayson (Attendant 2), Rolly Miranda (Security Guard), Enciong Reyes (Neighbourhood), Joey de Leon (Professor Presto), Rene Requiestas (Stallone), Richie D’Horsie (Kuya Freddie), Noel Ayala (Ungga), Rene Johnson (Gay)

Review by Andrew Leavold

We here at Bamboo Gods like to dig deep. Deeeeeep. So when Little Boy Blue suddenly appeared on the radar out of nowhere, believe me it’s an obscure one: a childish Catholic-laced E.T. ripoff from the Philippines, featuring a large blueberry that’s been molested by a Teletubby. Painful, infuriating, and at times like trying to stop a runaway bus with your teeth, it is nevertheless lovably dumb and, as far as lovably dumb Pinoy parodies go, one of the dumbest.

A squat stopper-shaped spaceship is spotted over Batangas, practically over the heads of three pre-teen cousins living in a simple nearby barrio. After their extended prayers – this is a devout Catholic family, you’ll need to remember - the kids beg their grandmother Panchang to tell stories of aliens – unbeknownst to them, at the same time the strange craft lands in the jungle. Aliens, says Panchang, descend from the heavens to punish the wicked. Just like Jesus, or, come to think of it, like Santa Claus. Back in the jungle the spaceship opens and out bounces a round rubber blue thing covered in squid suckers, and it takes refuge in the kids’ barn. The two young boys, Ato and the twitchy Empoy, are woken by strange sounds and uncover the creature scoffing the family corn. And what a creature it is: a head somewhere between a Gremlin and bloated Yoda atop a furry scrotum and Big Bird feet. And blue: all fluro blue, and emitting sounds like a mid-butchered veal (“Nyip! Nyip! Nyip!”). They argue over what to call it. “Do you remember the film ‘Extra Terrestrial?’” asks Ato. Tiny Terrestrial, they agree, or TT for short. “You’re just jealous,” they yell at their female cousin Neneng, the Drew Barrymore of this bizarre parallel universe, “that we have a TT [“titi” being Tagalog slang for penis] and you don’t.” They also settle on Little Boy Blue, and Neneng bonds with the gentle creature by pressing her finger lightly against TT’s rubber prong. It’s a touching scene in more ways than one, aiming for the emotion of Spielberg’s original but marred somewhat by TT’s high pitched bleating.

Of course you can’t have an ET clone without the meddling adult scientists, and at alien research group PAGNANASA’s headquarters, pretty young scientist Dr Delgado (and by young, I mean seventeen or eighteen) runs TT’s craft through a battery of tests. She believes the ship has emerged from inner space, not outer, and may be a relic from the lost city of Atlantis, thus proving the ranting renegade Dr Galileo’s theories correct. In Little Boy Blue there’s much discussion about Plato, and how the destruction of Atlantis is comparable to the fall of Sodom and Gomorrah. Huh? Don’t worry, it makes more sense soon… Dr Delgado’s limp-wristed boss Zarate orders her to head a team to capture the alien and perform further experiments. Her final analysis: TT is “gentle and very easy to love”. In another section of the scientific community the insane Galileo pays a goon squad headed by “Crocodile” Danding to kidnap Little Boy Blue and show the world just how sane he really is. Try to find the creature, however – TT spends much of his Earth time running around the village draped in a sheet or at the nearsighted Grandma Panchang’s house learning how Jesus is “God to all peoples”. Before you can say “Hail Mary” he’s kissing rosary beads and crossing himself, and in the film’s most uncomfortable moment, has a religious epiphany whilst comparing his own suffering to a wooden Jesus on a crucifix. You can imagine when he returns triumphantly to his home planet, like a round blue Conquistador, there are going to be conversions a-plenty.

A lame-duck Sunday School pantomime, or a Spielberg spoof that landed eight years too late? I’m having money each way. For all its inherent absurdity and ecumenical leanings, Little Boy Blue is a feeble-minded effort, a throwaway project clearly written on the hoof by the team who brought you the (ahem) superior Alyas Batman En Robin. I’d say it’s an easy bet that Joey de Leon and Tony Reyes don’t even remember flipping this cheap quickie off; at the time, writer/director Reyes and comedian Joey were the busiest creative unit in Filipino comedy, clocking in at around ten features each per year, and considered the top box office draw of 1989. Not everything they touch turned to gold, however, but they certainly give it the old Quezon City try, and for marquee value Joey phones in a cameo as PAGNANASA’s Professor Presto (he’s been peering at Venus – not the planet but his new secretary, fnyar fnyar). The usual suspects are rounded up and given their regulation two minutes of screen time: toothless and heartbroken Rene Requiestas is a barrio bum named Stallone who sees little blue monsters even before his first sip of Tanduay, and TVJ’s regular sidekick Richie D’Horsie strums a tasteful song about dying of cancer.

The film’s major flaws are its leaden pacing courtesy of director Eddie Reyes (son? Brother? Of Tony), its sledgehammer morality, and discomforting attempts at toilet humour aimed at an older demographic than its intended audience of under-tens. None of this is meant as harsh criticism, of course, and the gaping wounds are an essential part of its charm. When I use words like “unbearable”, I mean it with a father’s love for his hopelessly naïve and sugar-addicted infant. For me, I don’t know who’s more unbearable, and I love them equally and unconditionally – the child actor playing Empoy (another of the ubiquitous Reyes, this time Jay-Are), who delivers every line like he’s sleepwalking and trying to create static electricity by brushing both ears, or TT himself, the nyipping testicle betraying not a single emotion from under its rubber mat. His one discernable word – “Bye!” – comes not a moment too soon, and I for one wish Little Boy Blue so long, bon voyage, and thanks for the screaming.

Ungga!!!!!!!!

The Fantastic Sword (1976)

1976 – The Fantastic Sword (Hua Shan Films)

[Hong Kong/Philippines co-production, possibly with South Korean involvement. Philippines release date 12th November 1976, original title “Mahiwagang Kris”]

Director/Producer Hua Shan Presented by Lim Kam Youn Assistant Director Lim Jin Wai

Cast Ernie Garcia, Eddie Garcia, Gina Alajar, Vic Silayan, Bang Hi Joung

PetCor80’s review from the Cinehound Forum:

This obscurity (English dub and Chinese subs) has only recently surfaced and there is little info out there yet, so I thought I add my two cents with a small review. It's clearly a Filipino movie with some Hong Kong influence (direction, special effects) and according to some of the scarce sources there was also South-Korean involvement in the production.

NB In the following synopsis the names of the characters might be spelled wrong as I am writing them just the way I heard them.

This fantasy story that has lot's in common with similar Indonesian and Thai productions I've seen, takes place in a land called Berengkeng where a sultan rules a small community of farmers and fishermen. There is a local hero, the fisherman Merkieting who falls for the Sultans daughter princess Mary. But then there is also an evil wizard named Antingkan who wants her to be his. When the sultan is getting old he sees need for giving his daughter away to someone worthy of his throne and Antingkan is already scheming to win her hand. But then a mermaid caught in the nets of Merkieting and then kindly set free wants to help the poor fisherman. She gives him a gift with which he is sure to come in favour of the sultan. A box that allows travel to a place called 'civilisation' (a big modern day city, Manila maybe?).

Merkieting clearly has the best gift to present to the sultan, but Antingkan isn't called evil for nothing and enchants the sultan to pronounce him the winner. After this, Merkieting and princess Mary flee into civilisation. They learn that this modern world is full of people who say they want to help them but end up betraying them. First they learn about money, then they have to work. The princess turns out to be a good singer, but Merkieting is an even better fighter and he becomes a top boxer until he is forced to loose a fight by his manager. When he refuses it finally becomes really life threatening and the pair has to flee again, back to Berengkeng. There is now a small rebellion against Antingkan who has the sultan captured, but they are too weak and soon also captured. The mermaid keeps helping Merkieting however, and when all seems lost he is send on a quest for the Holy Sword that will help him defeat the wizard. When he succeeds in this quest the next one promptly presents itself as the princess is turned ugly by Antingkan and only a Holy fruit can save her. With the sword Merkieting is now able to fly, cleave mountains, fire lightning bolts and part water like Mozes, so he quickly goes out on this new challenge without fear. He faces a witch (with flying head!) and a very strong dragon guarding the tree with the fruit, but you can guess the way this one ends. The princess and the sultan are freed and the wizard is cornered until he escapes into civilisation where he will meet the same dangers the fleeing couple had before, but without a chance of ever turning back. The young lovers marry and they live happily ever after! The end.

From Ebay: “Ultra-rare asian action fantasy gem with ancient kingdoms, mermaids, living skeletons, crystal cages, dragons, giant monsters, strange creatures, magical caves, fantastic swords!”

DARNA #15: Darna (1991)

1991 – Darna (Viva Films)

[Release date 25th December 1991]

Director Joel Lamangan Story Eddie Rodriguez, Bey Vito Screenplay Frank G. Rivera Producer William Leary Executive Producer Vic del Rosario Jr Supervising Producer Eric Cuatico Musical Director Willy Cruz Cinematography Ramon Marcelino Sound Supervision Rolly Ruta Editor Ike Jarlego Jr Assistant Director Bey Vito Associate Producer Edith Manuel Assistant to the Executive Producer Sandy Santamaria Production Designer Benjie de Guzman Costume Designer Ernest Santiago Associate Editor Marya Ignacio Production Manager Lydia de Leon

Cast Nanette Medved (Narda/Darna), Nida Blanca, Edu Manzano (Dominico Lipolico), Pilar Pilapil (Valentina), Tonton Gutierrez, Bing Loyzaga (Impakta), Dennis Padilla, Atong Redillas, Donna Cruz, Tony Lambino, Dencio Padilla, Errol Dionisio, Archi Adamos, Ray Ventura, Boy Roque, Jun Hidalgo, Jim Pebanco, Carmi Matic, Guila Alvarez, Roland Montes, Rachel Alejandro (Donna), Herbert Bautista, Manny Castaneda, Joko Diaz, Keempee de Leon, IC Mendoza, Jinky Oda, Oscar Peralta, Amy Perez, Cherrie Pie Picache, Daria Ramirez, Ricardo Reynoso, Sylvia Sanchez, Raymart Santiago, Jimmy Santos, Jeffrey Veloso, Mary Walter [IMDB also lists Vina Morales, “Anna Marie Falcon”/Francine Prieto (Young Narda), Lorli Villanueva (Darna's Mother)]

From the Official Mars Ravelo’s Darna website:

After 10 years of hibernation Darna is back ! This time vivacious Nanette Medved carried the Darna mantle.

Darna hit the second spot at the box office in the 1991 Metro Manila Film festival.

The Darna icon soldiered on as esteemed director like Joel Lamangan tried their hand at the comic book legend. The results were mixed though. Lamangan used Nanette Medved in Viva Films’ Darna (1991), but it was Valentina again who stole the thunder, thanks to Pilar Pilapil’s comic performance.

Darna was Nanette's first solo picture. In this new campy updated version of Darna our super heroine had a little costume change, her head dress was replaced by a tiara - which I don’t really like! But of course, that is just my personal opinion. Viva's version of Darna is not really my cup of tea. Don't get me wrong, I just thought they can do better.

18 years of beauty rest Darna's number one arch enemy Valentina also made her comeback. The man eater Valentina was humorously played by one of the finest actresses of Philippine cinema Pilar Pilapil.

Another comeback queen is Babaing Impakta essayed by Bing Loyzaga. The flying vampire was also played by the veteran actress Gloria Romero in Lipad, Darna, Lipad.

Dominico Lipolico, a new villain was introduced in this movie played by Edu Manzano.

The movie started somewhere in South America. A group of treasure hunters lead by Domico found a cave full of treasures of golds and precious gem stones. Not wanting to share the good fortune, the greedy Dominico killed his men. Soon after, a voice of the devil that sounds like Ben David echoed in the cave. He told Dominico that he found the most powerful possesion of the darkness, a powerful necklace that will give him super powers, eternal youth, fame and fortune. In exchange of this, Dominico must spread demonism in South East Asia, starting in the Philippines.

As the story continues, a young Narda and Dong yes, a new brother of Narda, was introduced in the movie. She now have two brothers Ding and Dong. Don't their names sound like a door bell? I don't get why would they have to introduce a new brother? The character of Dong is really not that important in the story and did not make such a difference in the movie.

In the meantime, Dominico teamed up with Valentina and Babaing Impakta to spread evil. Of course, Darna after getting caught by her villains and almost turned her into one of them did her best to stop Dominico and his allies. I really enjoyed Pilar Pilapil comedic performance of Valentina and her snake puppet side kick Vibora voiced over by Ruby Rodriguez. It was really hilariously funny, at least to me. This come back movie of Darna doesn't have much to offer, some scenes are re-created from Lipad, Darna, Lipad. I also noticed Nanette keeps on posing with her hands on her hips you know, that typical superhero pose. It seems like she is always ready to have her picture taken. The people behind this movie should have given Nanette some time to have more training for her fight scenes to make her portrayal of Darna more believable. And also, what was the deal with her deflecting bullets with her bracelets? It reminds me of my other favorite super heroine who flies an invisible jet. To top it all I am so annoyed by that over acting police man.

The special effects were not that good either to think that it was made in the 90's. In fairness to Joel Lamangan, he is one of the finest local directors in the Philippine cinema can offer. Maybe because Darna was Joel first major movie to handle and fantasy adventure is not his area.

DARNA #16: Darna Ang Pagbabalik/"Darna The Return" (1994)

1994 - Darna Ang Pagbabalik/“Darna The Return” (Viva Family Entertainment)

[Release date 9th June 1994]

Directors/Writers Peque Gallaga, Lore Reyes Executive Producer Vic del Rosario Jr Associate Producer Teddy del Rosario Managing Producer Ricky del Rosario Musical Director Archie Castillo Supervising Producer Fred Samantela Art Direction Juliet Nanola Fetalve Editor Danny Gloria Visual Effects Monching Reyes Crew and Equipment Coordinator Oli Laperal Jr Production Manager Pong de Leon First Assistant Director Jerome Pobocan Second Assistant Director/Casting Director Jerry Lopez Sineneng Stunt Director Boy Salvador Prosthetics Supervisor Benny Batoctoy

Cast Anjanette Abayari (Darna/Narda), Edu Manzano (Max), Cherie Gil (Valentine), Pilita Corrales (Valentina), Rustom Padilla (Pol), Bong Alvarez (Magnum), Lester Llansang (Ding), Eva Ramos (L300 Noisy Mother), Pen Medina (Barangay Captain), Jemanine Campanilla (Pia), Romy Romulo (Valentine’s Driver), Jun Achaval/Dwight Gaston (Pilots), Jinky Laurel (Bank Teller), Chiquixeres Burgos (Governor), Bong Regala (Army Lieutenant), Noel Carpio (Police Sargeant), Mel Kimura/Justine Dee/Elsa de Venecia/Marissa de Guzman/Demi Alvarez (Valentine’s Assistants), Lilia Cuntapay (Old Valentina), Eugene Enriquez (Welder), Michelle Rufo (Eazy)

From the Official Mars Ravelo’s Darna website:

Gallaga’s Darna: Ang Pagbabalik (1994) was technically polished and Anjanette Abayari looked sensational in the revealing Darna costume; yet as a Darna movie (and a Gallaga film), it wasn’t memorable.

Fearless Anjanette essayed the role of Darna almost perfectly, without using a stunt double. For the fourth time aging reptilian, Valentina returns with Valentine and Magnum, her kids. Their mission is to get Narda's magical stone so Valentina can have her youth back. Her son made Narda fall in love with him so they can easily get what they want.

A volcanic eruption in the country side forces a number of families to abandon their homes in Talisay and seek refuge in Manila. Young country girl Narda leads a secret double life as the crime figthing Darna and can trasforms back and forth between this two personas by yelling out either "Narda" or "Darna". While trying to find her grandmother and little brother Ding, Narda is viciously struck upside the head and her magical stone that furnishes her power is stolen. The culprit is Valentine Adan, a tele evangelist who claims that only she can protect the city from an advancing lahar ( volcanic mud flow) and will save those who have pledge their undying devotion to her. Valentine’s dark intentions become more and more aparent and Narda discovers that the woman is actually the daughter of Valentina, Darna's arch enemy. Ding is able to recover the magical stone allowing his sister to transform back into Darna and in the ensuing chaos the aged Valentina is injured and reveals her true form. Like her mother Valentine is actually a gorgon concealing the snakes on her head beneath a bathing cap like hat (turban) before the inevitable face off with Valentine, Darna gains a new ally when she helps police lieutenant Max Ablan ( Edu Manzano) foil a bank robber and later, a kidnapping perpetrated mob boss Magnum (Bong Alvarez). The crime lord manages to escape in both instances, and is actually playing a key role in Valentines plans. She also has another clandestine operative, who is charged with making sure that Darna is helpless to protect Manila from the rapidly approaching lahar.

The movie showed some improvements in special effects. I am trying to be fair about giving my comments but, Peque Gallaga and his co-director used numerous slow motions that I thought is not relevant in some scenes. The flying scenes are accomplished with atrocious blue screen rear projection and cel animation, while the bladder and morphing FX utilized for the monsters are equally quaint. Althought it occationally delivers the serial-style thrills one expects from this genre, the screenplay is episodic and the proceeding are too slacky paced. They should also have revised the storyline like how Narda lost her memory and acted silly in almost half of the movie. It was a waste of time and negatives. I almost fell asleep waiting for Darna to show up again.

Cherrie Gil was great as Valentine. The only problem is her snake wig looks so fake they were not moving at all. And what's up with Valentine's allies? Why do they keep leaving their necklaces at the scene of the crime? It was not explained in the movie. If Valentine only wants Narda's magical stone she could had easily killed her when she had the chance. In the early part of the movie one of Valentine's followers hit Narda on the head that caused her memory loss and stole the magical stone. And when Valentine's car accidentally hit Narda and they came face to face, why didn't she recognize her? These are just some of the loop holes of the movie that I thought would have been easily spotted. I know that our local film makers can make such a great version of the next Darna, they just have to review the script carefully and give her more fight scenes and powerful enemies. And stop making Darna deflecting bullets because she is not vulnurable to any man made weapons. There also was a scene where Valentine hit Darna with a TV antenna and actually made her bleed. It does not make sense at all. Darna The Return, showed potential on making decent special effects. And one more thing - STOP changing Darna's costume we almost didn't recognized her.

Jared Auner’s review from his Worldweird Cinema blog:

DARNA ANG PAGBABALIK aka DARNA THE RETURN is a wacky Filipino superhero film from the early 1990s. It's filled with cheap special effects, poorly choreographed fights, decent enough looking latex creatures, blunt hack-job editing and only serviceable cinematography and acting. It's also completely fascinating and totally entertaining. Darna is kind of a Filipino Wonder Woman rip with a dash of Captain Marvel (you know: "Shazam!") and this is the second and final(?) film in the series. I haven't seen the first, but here's what I can make out about the series from this film.

Darna is Narda, a young, pretty and rather *ahem* busty young girl who when she swallows a magic pearl (I'm not making that up I swear!) and yells "Darna!" becomes, well yes, Darna, a flying , eye-laser-beam shooting, bikini-wearing superheroine out to defend poor Filipinos from bizarre supernatural villains, corrupt industrialists and rampant natural disasters. It's the rampant natural disasters that are featured prominently in this feature. Narda/ Darna's village is destroyed by a flood which displaces her family to the slums of Manila. Even worse, during the disaster Darna loses her Magic Pearl! It's been stolen by Valentina (or something), Darna's medusa-headed archfoe who needs the pearl to keep her medusa-headed mother alive (or something). She also happens to be attempting to take over the Philipines by sending out subliminal messages through the television, which is slowly winning the populace over to her weird, new age-y cult thing. Narda's mother falls for it.

Eventually Narda gets her pearl back, falls in love with two men, one a cop with a secret and the other her cousin (!?!) and it all ends with some wonderfully inexpensive special effects, silly fights (the ultimate showdown reminded me of a BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER episode at about 1/3 the production cost)and some sentimental exposition. It's all pretty weird and well, y'know, foreign. But it keeps up a terrific pace, with a constant barrage of cheesy fantasy and fighting. The inept film-making, acting and (on the DVD I viewed anyway) really horrible subtitling only enhances the bizarre spectacle of the whole thing. Go forth and find it, now!